Good afternoon everyone! Sorry for not posting anything for almost 2 months. I've been crazy busy with work, and that's occupied most of my time. Things are going well with me. I've just been trying to make it out here in the real world. It's tough sometimes, but I love a challenge. I'm trying to take everything in stride and grow as a person every day.
With that being said, I think I've decided to take on a major challenge, and it'll likely be the most difficult thing I've attempted in my life. I was recently talking to a good friend on the phone and he mentioned he was running in a half marathon in March. Of course me being the crazy person I am decided it would be a good idea to try and run the half marathon too.
I'm not exactly sure if I'll successfully run 13.1 miles, but I've got about 4 months to get into shape. That should be enough time to get in some kind of running shape. I'm taking it upon myself to train 5-6 days a week. I'm no running expert, so I've got some research to do before I get too far into training. I don't have any delusions about this, I just think it's a great way to help with getting in shape and staying on track with my weight loss goals. Killing quite a few birds with one stone with this crazy plan.
We'll see how it goes. I'll try to update on my progress regularly on here. If anyone has any tips feel free to share. Who knows, maybe I'll find a new hobby in the process of training for this half marathon. Have a good one y'all, and goodbye until next time.
-Hunter
Sunday, November 16, 2014
Sunday, September 14, 2014
Grinding
Good afternoon everyone! Hope your weekend has been pleasant in this lovely weather. I'm going to try and get back into the swing of posting on this blog normally, now that I've got both hands almost back to 100%. That being said, we'll see how diligent I am at keeping up with that schedule, ha.
The reason I'm writing this post is a little different than my previous posts. I've been giving a lot of time and effort to my work recently, and it seems like a never ending storm that never gets any better. You won't hear me complaining too much outside of work about my job, it pays the bills and my coworkers are flipping amazing. I give my all day in and day out, since that's the only way I know. Anyway, after putting in 60 hours and working yesterday I felt like I was burning myself out. I woke up today with a new outlook however.
I'm 26 years old, and nothing is given to people my age. We've got to work our, pardon my language, asses off to make it in this world. This week was nothing but a test of my mettle, and I'd like to think passed that test, but I can't judge that myself. I work my tail off to make a name for myself, and I'm blessed to be surrounded by people in my department who are in it for the same reasons. No matter what my job throws at us, which is my coworkers and myself, we're going to work to overcome the adversity. Mainly because we're all too damn hardheaded and stubborn to know another way to work.
We look after each other day in and day out to make sure the work gets done. There is no "down time" in my job. If there is then something isn't right. That being said, I don't know if I'd still be here if it wasn't for their constant encouragement and kind words. They've been like a second family to me, and I'll never be able to pay them back for everything that they've done for me.
I'll keep on keeping on, and put my nose to the grindstone. Working my tail off is something I've always tried to do, and I will never stop. I'm too stubborn to know anything better. I'm just hoping this commitment carries over to this weight loss thing I'm trying. Who knows what the future holds, but I'll greet it with welcome arms and take the challenges as they come.
Til next time,
Hunter
The reason I'm writing this post is a little different than my previous posts. I've been giving a lot of time and effort to my work recently, and it seems like a never ending storm that never gets any better. You won't hear me complaining too much outside of work about my job, it pays the bills and my coworkers are flipping amazing. I give my all day in and day out, since that's the only way I know. Anyway, after putting in 60 hours and working yesterday I felt like I was burning myself out. I woke up today with a new outlook however.
I'm 26 years old, and nothing is given to people my age. We've got to work our, pardon my language, asses off to make it in this world. This week was nothing but a test of my mettle, and I'd like to think passed that test, but I can't judge that myself. I work my tail off to make a name for myself, and I'm blessed to be surrounded by people in my department who are in it for the same reasons. No matter what my job throws at us, which is my coworkers and myself, we're going to work to overcome the adversity. Mainly because we're all too damn hardheaded and stubborn to know another way to work.
We look after each other day in and day out to make sure the work gets done. There is no "down time" in my job. If there is then something isn't right. That being said, I don't know if I'd still be here if it wasn't for their constant encouragement and kind words. They've been like a second family to me, and I'll never be able to pay them back for everything that they've done for me.
I'll keep on keeping on, and put my nose to the grindstone. Working my tail off is something I've always tried to do, and I will never stop. I'm too stubborn to know anything better. I'm just hoping this commitment carries over to this weight loss thing I'm trying. Who knows what the future holds, but I'll greet it with welcome arms and take the challenges as they come.
Til next time,
Hunter
Sunday, September 7, 2014
Lately...
Good evening everyone. I know it's been a while since I've posted. Had a broken hand since July and have been saving my typing for work. I'm expected to get the all clear this week so I figured I'd go ahead and post again. I've been doing better, I guess. The depression comes and goes, but it's less frequent and severe, so that's a good thing. I've just been trying to keep a more positive outlook on life recently. It's too precious and special to just let it slip away.
I guess I've come to learn that from my therapy sessions and just taking time to think about life in general. I've got a lot of folks to thank for turning me around, and I won't name names, but if you've reached out to me through this time then you're one of them! Progress is progress, and while I may doubt myself some days (less nowadays than a few months ago), I know that I've got people who depend on me. Whether it's my family or friends, I know that they're there to help me, just as I try to help them when I'm needed. Writing that out, it sounds so simple, but I know it isn't. It's taken me a while to realize that while I keep on giving to help others out, people have also been helping me through this tough time. I can't say thanks enough, because it did get pretty dark there for a while. I'll be the first to admit that.
In therapy we've been talking about ways to deal with stress and anxiety. One way for males to vent is to "get physical." Whether it's working out or just walking around for a little while in the middle of a stressful situation. I was beginning to work out and be more active when I broke my hand playing soccer (yes you read that correctly). Long story short I got kicked on both sides of the hand at the same time and fractured the fifth metacarpal in my right hand. Was in a hard cast for 3 weeks, removable cast for 6, and I should get the all clear to begin strenuous physical activity again on Thursday.
That being said I think it's time to share something that I haven't really told anyone. I've lost about 40 pounds this year, which has put me around 240 pounds. My goal by the end of next year is to be down around 180. It's going to be tough, but I think if I give it my all I can do it. I've got to start eating better or my body might turn on me. Now if I could just find me a girlfriend I think I'd be right as rain, ha! That's a story for another day my friends. Anyway, hope everyone that reads this has been well. Til next time.
Hunter
I guess I've come to learn that from my therapy sessions and just taking time to think about life in general. I've got a lot of folks to thank for turning me around, and I won't name names, but if you've reached out to me through this time then you're one of them! Progress is progress, and while I may doubt myself some days (less nowadays than a few months ago), I know that I've got people who depend on me. Whether it's my family or friends, I know that they're there to help me, just as I try to help them when I'm needed. Writing that out, it sounds so simple, but I know it isn't. It's taken me a while to realize that while I keep on giving to help others out, people have also been helping me through this tough time. I can't say thanks enough, because it did get pretty dark there for a while. I'll be the first to admit that.
In therapy we've been talking about ways to deal with stress and anxiety. One way for males to vent is to "get physical." Whether it's working out or just walking around for a little while in the middle of a stressful situation. I was beginning to work out and be more active when I broke my hand playing soccer (yes you read that correctly). Long story short I got kicked on both sides of the hand at the same time and fractured the fifth metacarpal in my right hand. Was in a hard cast for 3 weeks, removable cast for 6, and I should get the all clear to begin strenuous physical activity again on Thursday.
That being said I think it's time to share something that I haven't really told anyone. I've lost about 40 pounds this year, which has put me around 240 pounds. My goal by the end of next year is to be down around 180. It's going to be tough, but I think if I give it my all I can do it. I've got to start eating better or my body might turn on me. Now if I could just find me a girlfriend I think I'd be right as rain, ha! That's a story for another day my friends. Anyway, hope everyone that reads this has been well. Til next time.
Hunter
Sunday, June 29, 2014
Times they are a changing....
Good evening everyone, hope all is well with you. I've been having a rough week, the only bright spots being birthday celebrations. Between insurance changing at work and doubling in cost, working a little too much and my complete ineptitude when it comes to women, it's been a hell of a week. That being said, I can't look back on that, I've just got to take the experiences I've had this week, apply the good and get the bad out. All of this stress I've been feeling is trying to take over, but through my therapy I'm slowly learning to deal with it in a healthy way, or at least we hope it continues that way!
Speaking of therapy, something we talked about last week really hit home. We were speaking about the goals I had for therapy, and how we were going to work to achieve them. For whatever reason the doctor stopped in mid explanation to tell me an observation he had about me in our short time together. He said, "Hunter I think I can piece something together about you just from the conversations that we've had. When people love you, you like yourself alright, but when people hate you you feel like the worst person on the Earth." He hit the nail on the head. I don't know why I'm that way, but I can't help it. I always over analyze every little thing that happens, from a two second conversation to a 30 minute phone call. My mind is wired to, what I like to call, "hyper-analyze" every thing. It's a blessing and a curse at the same damn time, unfortunately.
Who knows when I'll finally be over that, but I'm trying to get better. Everyone has told me that they can tell a difference, so that's a start. Luckily my support group is still really strong, from my coworkers(who are a second family to me!) and friends, to my family, I know that I've always got people who are pushing me to get better, and who genuinely care. That's something that is, and always will be gratifying to see. I like to think I'm a good friend most of the time, but man some of my friends are making me realize there is so much more that I can do!
I felt like I needed to say that, just in case there are people out there who don't realize how much they really mean to me. I honestly feel that I wouldn't be here without your support. I came close to ending it all about 3 months ago, but I was helped through that tough time by everyone I call my friend/family. My thanks will never be enough to repay that, and I mean that with my entire being.
At the end of the day I'm just a (somewhat) normal dude who may care to much about what people think, but that's gotten me this far in life. I truly can see the therapy working, and it's always good when you're therapist says he'll work with you even though he doesn't take your new insurance. We've still got a lot of work to do, and the journey will get harder before the end, but I'm committed to trying to see this out and come out better for it. I'm always up for a challenge, and this may be the hardest one in my life. Who says I can't rise above it and come out on top in the end.
Until next time,
Hunter
Speaking of therapy, something we talked about last week really hit home. We were speaking about the goals I had for therapy, and how we were going to work to achieve them. For whatever reason the doctor stopped in mid explanation to tell me an observation he had about me in our short time together. He said, "Hunter I think I can piece something together about you just from the conversations that we've had. When people love you, you like yourself alright, but when people hate you you feel like the worst person on the Earth." He hit the nail on the head. I don't know why I'm that way, but I can't help it. I always over analyze every little thing that happens, from a two second conversation to a 30 minute phone call. My mind is wired to, what I like to call, "hyper-analyze" every thing. It's a blessing and a curse at the same damn time, unfortunately.
Who knows when I'll finally be over that, but I'm trying to get better. Everyone has told me that they can tell a difference, so that's a start. Luckily my support group is still really strong, from my coworkers(who are a second family to me!) and friends, to my family, I know that I've always got people who are pushing me to get better, and who genuinely care. That's something that is, and always will be gratifying to see. I like to think I'm a good friend most of the time, but man some of my friends are making me realize there is so much more that I can do!
I felt like I needed to say that, just in case there are people out there who don't realize how much they really mean to me. I honestly feel that I wouldn't be here without your support. I came close to ending it all about 3 months ago, but I was helped through that tough time by everyone I call my friend/family. My thanks will never be enough to repay that, and I mean that with my entire being.
At the end of the day I'm just a (somewhat) normal dude who may care to much about what people think, but that's gotten me this far in life. I truly can see the therapy working, and it's always good when you're therapist says he'll work with you even though he doesn't take your new insurance. We've still got a lot of work to do, and the journey will get harder before the end, but I'm committed to trying to see this out and come out better for it. I'm always up for a challenge, and this may be the hardest one in my life. Who says I can't rise above it and come out on top in the end.
Until next time,
Hunter
Monday, June 9, 2014
Finding yourself
Good evening everyone. Sorry for the delay in posts. I've been doing a lot of stuff on my own to try and help me through this. I went to see a counselor about a month ago. Her advice on trying to get over my father's death, and some of the other things that I think hold me back, was to read a book and watch Oprah... I'm not even kidding. Someone who has a doctorate couldn't give me any better advice than that. Anyway, I guess I should be happy, because she also recommended going to see a clinical psychologist. Needless to say I felt like I needed someone to talk to regarding the stuff that was going on through my head who was a professional. Don't get me wrong, I've reached out to a lot of my friends and family regarding this, and their advice has been amazing. More than that, the show of support has been so gratifying that I'm beginning to wonder what I've done to deserve everyone who has helped. But I digress, through a couple of phone calls and communication with different psychologists I found Dr. William Mealer.
I must say that in my short time seeing him I do feel a certain degree better. I don't know if it's because life has been genuinely better lately, or if my whole outlook is changing. That's one of the big things we've been talking about in our sessions, your perceptions of everyday life. It all depends on how you take what happens to you. I've tended to look at the dark side of everything lately. While I'm not sure what initially brought this on, I can tell you that it hasn't been a pleasant time dealing with that. I've tried to live my life looking at the positives, I mean I've got nothing to be upset about in the grand scheme of things. I've fallen off that path in the past 7ish months. We're working to get me back where I need to be, but like I've come to learn, this kind of stuff takes time. There isn't a magic button to push that makes it all better. Through a lot of talking and applying the lessons I'm being taught in therapy we hope to be able to deal with these negative feelings in a constructive manner, instead of the destructive way I've been dealing lately.
I'm currently working on setting out a treatment plan, but I think we're almost done there. From here on out it's learning how to deal and become a more self confident person. That's a major issue of mine, and one of the focal points of this therapy. Who knows, but for now I'm confident of what direction we're moving in. As a matter of fact I'm supposed to turn in some goals for therapy tomorrow. They're listed below, just in case anyone wants to get a glimpse inside my mind right now...
I must say that in my short time seeing him I do feel a certain degree better. I don't know if it's because life has been genuinely better lately, or if my whole outlook is changing. That's one of the big things we've been talking about in our sessions, your perceptions of everyday life. It all depends on how you take what happens to you. I've tended to look at the dark side of everything lately. While I'm not sure what initially brought this on, I can tell you that it hasn't been a pleasant time dealing with that. I've tried to live my life looking at the positives, I mean I've got nothing to be upset about in the grand scheme of things. I've fallen off that path in the past 7ish months. We're working to get me back where I need to be, but like I've come to learn, this kind of stuff takes time. There isn't a magic button to push that makes it all better. Through a lot of talking and applying the lessons I'm being taught in therapy we hope to be able to deal with these negative feelings in a constructive manner, instead of the destructive way I've been dealing lately.
I'm currently working on setting out a treatment plan, but I think we're almost done there. From here on out it's learning how to deal and become a more self confident person. That's a major issue of mine, and one of the focal points of this therapy. Who knows, but for now I'm confident of what direction we're moving in. As a matter of fact I'm supposed to turn in some goals for therapy tomorrow. They're listed below, just in case anyone wants to get a glimpse inside my mind right now...
- Physical goals: lose another 40+ pounds to get below 200 pounds for the first time in 8 years, start playing soccer more often, start trail riding, continue dieting and attempting to eat better
- Emotional goals: learn to deal with the day to day stress in a healthy way, continue thinking positive thoughts and try to get more confident, try not to lose my cool when I’m flustered, try to be a better person than I am right now
- Intellectual goals: continue to read for pleasure, keep writing (blogging, journaling, etc), learn German or Spanish, try to keep my mind active and off of the negatives in life
- Social goals: continue hanging out with my good friends, make new friends whenever possible, branch out of my comfort zone more often, try and find a girlfriend, stay in touch with everyone that I care about
Not sure I would've posted those a year ago, but time changes everything. Anywho, I'll do my best to post more regularly. Hopefully everything continues to improve, it's just going to take some time and hard work. Let me know what you think.
Until next time,
Hunter
Monday, May 5, 2014
The past is the past...
Good afternoon everyone,
I've been having a rough go lately. My moods have definitely been better, and I've got my friends to thank for that. Over the past three weeks I've had 2 panic attacks. I'm not sure of the exact cause of them, but I know that the first one stems from something that my mother told me about my father. She had nothing but good intentions with what she said, but my idiot brain took it another direction. I legitimately freaked out and didn't get much sleep over a 2 day period. I will admit that I had some not so happy thoughts, and once again was thinking about ending it all. Never fear, I'm slowly on the mend thanks to some new meds, some great friends and some sound advice from a couple of doctors.
My main problem is that I have difficulty accepting the past, and what has happened in my life. I can't change anything that has happened to me. I've just got to use that stuff to my advantage. I've been told to not dwell on the negatives and start building on the positives in my life. So that's the building block to moving on from all these things that are holding me back. I'm going to make a list of everything, and everyone, that I'm thankful for, and use that as a coping method (hopefully). Time heals all wounds, but some mine are a decade or older. I've got to get myself out of this mindset and move in the right direction.
I'm lucky to have an amazing support group. While I won't name names (just to keep some stuff off of here) I will say a gigantic thank you for the millionth time. I can never say that enough. Love is not necessarily a word, it's more of an action than anything. You guys have shown me more love than I ever thought possible, even if it's just a text or a prayer. It means the world to me that people take time out of their busy schedules to care about a 25 year old man who can't seem to help himself get out of his own mind. I keep being told how wonderful I am as a person, so I take that as a huge compliment, even if I think to myself I'm not that great. What others think of you tends to be the person you really are, in my honest opinion. I've just got to learn to accept the past. Acceptance is the last stage of the grieving process, so when I look back at all I've been through I've technically made it through the difficult stuff. I just have to learn when to let go of something, especially when there's no hope in hell of changing it.
This is of course easier said than done. Any insight is greatly appreciated. In the mean time I'm going to a psychiatrist to get some of this stuff that I've been carrying for years off of my chest. In a way this blog is a portal for me to vent. I've come so far in the past 5 months, looking back. I never would've started a blog to show people I might not even know an insight into my personal life. That in itself is a step in the right direction. I've just got to keep pushing, and while there will be setbacks on my road to recovery, I've just got to take the bad with the good and use that to make me a better person. At the end of the day if I can help one person's burden a little easier I've done some good. That is another step for me. I love helping others in any way, and it helps me to move on, in a weird way. It's worked in the past, I just need to get better at serving, and that in turn should help me be able to let go. Or at least that's what I hope will happen. It's all trial and error here, there is no one right answer. I've got to build that foundation and move on from there.
Until next time,
Hunter
I've been having a rough go lately. My moods have definitely been better, and I've got my friends to thank for that. Over the past three weeks I've had 2 panic attacks. I'm not sure of the exact cause of them, but I know that the first one stems from something that my mother told me about my father. She had nothing but good intentions with what she said, but my idiot brain took it another direction. I legitimately freaked out and didn't get much sleep over a 2 day period. I will admit that I had some not so happy thoughts, and once again was thinking about ending it all. Never fear, I'm slowly on the mend thanks to some new meds, some great friends and some sound advice from a couple of doctors.
My main problem is that I have difficulty accepting the past, and what has happened in my life. I can't change anything that has happened to me. I've just got to use that stuff to my advantage. I've been told to not dwell on the negatives and start building on the positives in my life. So that's the building block to moving on from all these things that are holding me back. I'm going to make a list of everything, and everyone, that I'm thankful for, and use that as a coping method (hopefully). Time heals all wounds, but some mine are a decade or older. I've got to get myself out of this mindset and move in the right direction.
I'm lucky to have an amazing support group. While I won't name names (just to keep some stuff off of here) I will say a gigantic thank you for the millionth time. I can never say that enough. Love is not necessarily a word, it's more of an action than anything. You guys have shown me more love than I ever thought possible, even if it's just a text or a prayer. It means the world to me that people take time out of their busy schedules to care about a 25 year old man who can't seem to help himself get out of his own mind. I keep being told how wonderful I am as a person, so I take that as a huge compliment, even if I think to myself I'm not that great. What others think of you tends to be the person you really are, in my honest opinion. I've just got to learn to accept the past. Acceptance is the last stage of the grieving process, so when I look back at all I've been through I've technically made it through the difficult stuff. I just have to learn when to let go of something, especially when there's no hope in hell of changing it.
This is of course easier said than done. Any insight is greatly appreciated. In the mean time I'm going to a psychiatrist to get some of this stuff that I've been carrying for years off of my chest. In a way this blog is a portal for me to vent. I've come so far in the past 5 months, looking back. I never would've started a blog to show people I might not even know an insight into my personal life. That in itself is a step in the right direction. I've just got to keep pushing, and while there will be setbacks on my road to recovery, I've just got to take the bad with the good and use that to make me a better person. At the end of the day if I can help one person's burden a little easier I've done some good. That is another step for me. I love helping others in any way, and it helps me to move on, in a weird way. It's worked in the past, I just need to get better at serving, and that in turn should help me be able to let go. Or at least that's what I hope will happen. It's all trial and error here, there is no one right answer. I've got to build that foundation and move on from there.
Until next time,
Hunter
Sunday, April 20, 2014
ALIVE
Good evening everyone, and happy Easter! I hope everyone got to spend some good quality time with family today. I figured I was overdue for a blog post, so here we are again! I've been having a lot of ups and downs lately. I'm not exactly sure what's causing it, but my mood sure is swinging. Who knows what will finally get my head right, but I know it's going to take a lot of work on my end to get things straight. This blog is one of the things that has helped me vent and get some things off of my chest. It's so relieving to get some of my thoughts out and see what others have to say about it.
For a while I've been wondering if I'm deserving of this life that I have. I've been down on myself more than normal lately thinking about that. I guess the reason I'm so hard on myself is because I need to be the best man that I can be, and I've been failing miserably at this lately. I've got an amazing life, a good job, a loving family, great friends and my health is alright. My Instagram page is a collection of the good times that I do have, but I keep feeling like I'm missing out on something. It's very selfish of me to want more than I have, but that's how I feel right now. Time will tell what I'm truly missing, but until then I've got to keep searching!
I have a tendency to pour some of myself into the lives of people I truly care about. I try to get to know them and their families/friends on a deeper level than normal folks, or at least that's what I'd like to think. It brings me joy to care about someone besides myself. I genuinely care about all of my friends and family, and I'd do anything for a good bit of them. Does that make me weird, probably. Do I care how people view me for thinking this way, no. It's a way that I try to show that I care about my friends and family. I try to help out where I can in anyone's life that will let me, but I've never truly had that feeling returned to me until about a 6-7 weeks ago.
I've gone through life helping out everyone as I could and never expecting anything in return. Then out of the blue people began reaching out to me about the issues I've been going through. There is nothing more humbling to see that happen. I'm not sure what I've done to deserve any of the good things that have happened to me recently, but I'm trying to do what I can to repay that debt.One by one I'm hoping to pay back the immense show of support I was given, and I hope that I never stop giving. I really do...
Of course it would probably help if I could pour myself into another person's life that was meant to be the one. I'm still on that hunt, and who knows how long I'll be doing that. I hope to one day find someone to spend the rest of my life with, but for now I'll just wait patiently. I've sought a lot of advice on this subject, and almost everyone has told me to just be patient. I actually went on a date last week, and I thought it went well, but as it turns out it probably wasn't meant to be. Another one of life's tests, and I'm not sure if I passed or failed. That's another blog post altogether, ha!
Regardless I'm certainly finding out who my friends are through this whole ordeal of depression/stomach pains that has been going on since October. It's amazing what putting yourself out there to the ones who love you can do. Don't be afraid to ask questions, especially to those you really trust. You never know, you could find the answer you've been looking for all along. I just want to say that if anyone who reads this blog ever needs anything from me, just let me know. I may not be able to help 100%, but I'll give it my best effort!
Until next time,
Hunter
P.S., at the advice of my good friend Jenna, I think I'm going to start writing a "parallel" blog to this one. I do love a good craft beer, and hearing her mention this has hatched an idea in my head. I think I'm going to start writing a blog about craft beer in the near future to go with this one. Let me know what you think of that idea!
For a while I've been wondering if I'm deserving of this life that I have. I've been down on myself more than normal lately thinking about that. I guess the reason I'm so hard on myself is because I need to be the best man that I can be, and I've been failing miserably at this lately. I've got an amazing life, a good job, a loving family, great friends and my health is alright. My Instagram page is a collection of the good times that I do have, but I keep feeling like I'm missing out on something. It's very selfish of me to want more than I have, but that's how I feel right now. Time will tell what I'm truly missing, but until then I've got to keep searching!
I have a tendency to pour some of myself into the lives of people I truly care about. I try to get to know them and their families/friends on a deeper level than normal folks, or at least that's what I'd like to think. It brings me joy to care about someone besides myself. I genuinely care about all of my friends and family, and I'd do anything for a good bit of them. Does that make me weird, probably. Do I care how people view me for thinking this way, no. It's a way that I try to show that I care about my friends and family. I try to help out where I can in anyone's life that will let me, but I've never truly had that feeling returned to me until about a 6-7 weeks ago.
I've gone through life helping out everyone as I could and never expecting anything in return. Then out of the blue people began reaching out to me about the issues I've been going through. There is nothing more humbling to see that happen. I'm not sure what I've done to deserve any of the good things that have happened to me recently, but I'm trying to do what I can to repay that debt.One by one I'm hoping to pay back the immense show of support I was given, and I hope that I never stop giving. I really do...
Of course it would probably help if I could pour myself into another person's life that was meant to be the one. I'm still on that hunt, and who knows how long I'll be doing that. I hope to one day find someone to spend the rest of my life with, but for now I'll just wait patiently. I've sought a lot of advice on this subject, and almost everyone has told me to just be patient. I actually went on a date last week, and I thought it went well, but as it turns out it probably wasn't meant to be. Another one of life's tests, and I'm not sure if I passed or failed. That's another blog post altogether, ha!
Regardless I'm certainly finding out who my friends are through this whole ordeal of depression/stomach pains that has been going on since October. It's amazing what putting yourself out there to the ones who love you can do. Don't be afraid to ask questions, especially to those you really trust. You never know, you could find the answer you've been looking for all along. I just want to say that if anyone who reads this blog ever needs anything from me, just let me know. I may not be able to help 100%, but I'll give it my best effort!
Until next time,
Hunter
P.S., at the advice of my good friend Jenna, I think I'm going to start writing a "parallel" blog to this one. I do love a good craft beer, and hearing her mention this has hatched an idea in my head. I think I'm going to start writing a blog about craft beer in the near future to go with this one. Let me know what you think of that idea!
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